If I Could Spend One More Day With Anyone, It Will Be You

It’s been a while since either of us wrote a post. Though we have been busy, this blog is very much still around.

Compared to my day job (I run a pretty popular website), the traffic from this blog is wayyy lower.  However, The Little Nathaniel do get a handful of unique visitors each week. And whenever I see some traffic on the site, my heart goes out to you, whoever it is who is reading.

I am really sorry if you lost a child recently.

Maybe one day, we will meet. I hope and pray that you (and your spouse) will find the courage to move forward in your lives in the hope that one day, you will find your joy even though the days may appear unforgivingly dark right now.

Though my wife and I have been through a personal tragedy ourselves which few words can describe, I dare not say we know how you feel.

There is a popular question that people love asking.

“If you could spend a day (or have a meal) with anyone, past or present, who will it be.”

Recently, I thought about this question and here’s my answer.

#1 Little Nate will be top on my list. 

I don’t know what we will do. He will probably spends his entire day drinking milk, pooping, peeing and sleeping. I will do about 7-8 diapers change and just look, hug and kiss him during the time.

It does feel unfair. Spending less than 5 minutes in total with a child who was already gone by the time we saw and carried him. Two kisses. A few words. A prayer. That’s all.

I still remember the smile on his mother’s face when he was delivered. In spite of her sadness, seeing him was enough for her to break into a smile, even if it was just a short while.

It was a quiet operating theatre. The nurse told me “he’s a boy” and that the time was “4:35pm”. Just these two statements.

We miss you darling.

# 2 Natalie (Sib) Is Next

Next on my list is our 18-month old daughter. If I could spend a day alone with anyone right now, it will be her. And yes, we are going to have some daddy/daughter time this weekend!

I don’t know if any dad actually describe their relationship with their daughter this way but having Natalie around is just like falling in love…all over again!

You feel young, energetic, happy and everyone else is just looking at the two of you (with envy sometimes) having the time of our lives. What do we do? We talk baby gibberish words with one another, and find, do and laugh at the silliest, lamest and dumbest thing that either of us can think of.

If you want to share your story with me, you reach me at timothy.hozixin@gmail.com

We also have a small, closed Facebook group. If you wish to join, drop me an email and I will add you into it. 

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